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Having it all, except time for yourself

A glimpse at the daily schedule of a working mom. Makes me tired just typing it. This is what having it all (except time for yourself) looks like.

I realized I haven't blogged in a quite a long time. Then I thought about my schedule and how every single minute is completely booked. (Okay there's about an hour and a half there of napping/comatose television watching, so I guess I could be using that time to write a screenplay, learn Japanese, or volunteer with homeless, handicapped kittens.)

I know many moms out there in Arlington are probably living this nearly exact same day. If so, post a comment and let me know how you do it, because I'm still trying to figure it out!

So here it is. A day in the life of a working mom—by the minute.

7 a.m. – wake up and nurse the baby

7:15 – change poopy diaper and dress baby for the day

7:30 – pass the baby off to his Dad and get myself ready for the day

8:00 – feed the baby breakfast: oatmeal, yogurt and fruit puree

8:15 – clean up the baby and pump breastmilk for his lunch

8:30 – nanny arrives

8:35 - walk the dog

8:45 – drive to work

9:30 to 6 p.m. (sometimes  7, latest 7:30) – work

6/7:00 – race home usually running red lights to maximize time with Charlie before he goes to sleep

7:00 – arrive home, quickly change, pee and put away milk I pumped at work

7:05 – nurse the baby

7:15-7:45 – fun family play time

7:45-8 – micronap while Daddy gets baby ready for bed

8:00 – nurse the baby, snuggle and put him down for the night (this is my favorite part of the day)

8:30 – dinner

9-10:30 – mindlessly watch TV, fall asleep on the couch

10:30-11 – blog, answer work emails, facebook, email friends

11 – pump breastmilk while listening to Fresh Air on the NPR app

11:15 – brush teeth, clean and organize breast milk bottles and diaper bag for the the next day

11:30- Fall asleep. Very, very fast asleep.

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Mallory July 27, 2011 at 01:06 AM
Hang in there and don't give up! YOu are doing the right thing by building a future for your family and sacrificing yourself. No lunch, yogo, napping for you. If you really look back in history, women always worked - in the field, making clothes, in factories etc. Post WWII created a very unsustainable and frankly lazy breed of women and men. Who has the luxury to stay home! My kids respect hard work and are independent and the teachers' pet because their mom was not hovering over them. Keep standing up for yourself!
BD September 14, 2011 at 10:46 PM
No, working is not a choice, but having a baby is as is the time you choose to have it.
Melisa Passanisi Thorne January 06, 2012 at 05:54 PM
So I caught this Blog while surfing around. When I read through some of the comments my jaw dropped. I know I'm late to the party, but I can't 'not' say something. First, I love the word douchbag, it's fabulous. I wish I invented it. Second, Work/Life balance is bull. It presumes that work is in opposition to life. Bull. Every day is work. No matter what we do. Stay at home moms are working moms. As are moms in the workforce. Also, the concept sets us up for terrible guilt. For me it's a juggle; its realizing that if one part of my life temporarily takes on greater importance (e.g. a sick child, work trip or family matter), then I have to throw everything I have in its direction. That means the other areas suffer. I think it is unfair for anyone to judge how someone choses to parent. We're all trying to what's best for our families. Don't pick apart if other chose to do this differently then yourself. I have 2 children under 6 and I remember those days of night feeding, pumping at work, trying to get home to the babies so that i could spend some quality time with them they went to bed. I empathize. You are doing what is best for your family. I give you apropos for that.
Mandy Donovan Drake January 06, 2012 at 10:34 PM
Good points, Melissa! Thanks for reviving the conversation! It's a juggle, this working parent business. And many of us are doing all we can just to keep the balls in the air. I hope that all parents can support each other in our efforts to raise (and spend time) with our kids. Looking at that schedule now, I realize how much things have already changed! I have a full-fledged toddler now, who’s no longer nursing. We're all sleeping at night so I've got more energy to enjoy my time with the boy. I've also managed to negotiate with my employer a schedule that allows me to be home at 5:30. It means logging on after-hours some nights, and having to not get sucked into meetings that linger past 5. But for now it’s working, and both Mom, Dad and Baby Boy are happy with the current situation. The key I think is that the balance is different for every family - so maybe we shouldn't be judging each others' definition of what that looks like. I wish you luck in finding your own balance!
Melisa Passanisi Thorne January 07, 2012 at 12:20 AM
Thanks Mandy! I loved nursing, but man, did life get easier when I stopped doing it. I blog over at the Stoneham Patch, so feel free drop in if you wish. Happy Parenting!

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